Confession #9- Healing

Confession #9- "Healing"...

As I have blogged before, when I am in the shower I have my alone time with God. My shower is in the middle of my wound care so, to be honest, I'm usually venting & complaining to God... "This is stupid!", "God you could take this away, but you don't... WHY?!", "Sometimes I just get so frustrated, because God you could remove the thorn from my side", "Why God... Why???" Those are all things that I have said to God at some point or another. I, often times, forget how big God is... We accept the cards we are given as "the new normal", not remembering that the man who gave us those cards, can change them! I have always thought that, when God chooses to heal me, it would be fast & that He would show off... I'm excited to share that story with you all!!!


Last Thursday, Oct. 11, 2012, was a day like every other "doctor visit day". My grandma took off work, we went to get her hair cut, come back home & I got ready to go to the doctor... I was 9 days post-operation from my last surgery. My doctor walks in & asks if I know of any major changes, to which I reply "No, sir... Just the usual." He puts on his gloves... Spreads me apart... & goes, "Oh... My... Gosh..." Now you have to understand- that has never been a good sign, so I go," great, what is it now... Am I worse? Have you found a monster? What's happened?" My doctor doesn't respond... He only asks the nurse if she's got a picture for documentation. This isn't normal, my doctor, much like myself, is NEVER speechless... He looks at me, almost like he had seen the hand of God, & begins to cry. This is also shocking to me, so I wasn't sure how to respond... Almost all of the color had disappeared from his face, when finally he said "This is nothing but a miracle!" I was still confused, so he shared that my wound had shrunk over 5 centimeters in 1 week (I consider shrinking 0.5 CM in a week a good report)! He then looks at me, with tears filling his eyes, & says "I've never seen anything like this! It's a remarkable miraculous intervention! I'll see you in a week, you should be very close to being completely better by then. You can resume jogging again!"


"OBJECTS IN MIRROR ARE CLOSER THAN THEY APPEAR." When I was outside cleaning my grandma's car glasses, that was written on the mirror. How often do we actually pay attention to that? We don't. Why? Because we accept it as "the new normal". We might think a car would be kinda far off, but then, all of a sudden, it might be right by our side. Why? Because "OBJECTS IN MIRROR ARE CLOSER THAN THEY APPEAR." We might look & the car is off in the distance, but before we know it, it be right beside us. I think that's how God is... We accept hard times as "the new normal", and we learn to cope with it. Sometimes, I think that's what God wants us to do... Just when we think healing is so far off in the distance... that's when He shows up in a BIG MIRACULOUS way, then we have NO doubt but to KNOW that it was grace that carried us through.


Are you going through a tough time? Have you accepted it as "the new normal"? Are you just looking in the mirror waiting for God to show up & show out? Does God's promises look far off in the distance? Don't give up! God is always right on time! Before you know it, what you've been praying for will be right by your side! "OBJECTS IN MIRROR ARE CLOSER THAN THEY APPEAR!"


PS- I appreciate each prayer & encouraging word you all have passed along! I ask that you continue to pray! I am almost through this... Almost!

Sincerely-
College Conservative

Confession #8- What If The Healing Never Comes?

Confession #8- "What If The Healing Never Comes..."

Yesterday I found out that today (October 2, 2012), I will be going down for my 7th surgery... & I wasn't going to blog until afterwards until I heard a song on KLove called "Even If" by Kutless... It poses the question "What if the healing NEVER comes?" What if what you're hoping for doesn't arrive? What if God says "No"?... If that happens, then what??? What are we left with? What is can you to hold on to?

They sing:
"Lord we know your ways are not our ways
So we set our faith in who You are
Even though You reign high above us
You tenderly love us
We know Your heart
And we rest in who You are"

Even if the healing never comes... We can rest assured God loves us!

Romans 5:8 "But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us."

Even if the healing never comes... We can rest assured that God is by our side!

1 Peter 5:6-7 "Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."

Even if the healing never comes... We can rest assured God is looking out for what is best for us!

Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

"Even if the healing doesn't come
And life falls apart
And dreams are still undone
You are God You are good
Forever faithful One
Even if the healing
Even if the healing doesn't come"

Your prayers are much appreciated today! I am so thankful for your support!!!